Disappointment is part of life.

Wikipedia describes disappointment as a feeling of the dissatisfaction that follows the failure of expectations, hopes to manifest.

People can get disappointed because (1) the things they wanted to happen did not happen; (2) that things that wanted to happen has not happened yet; (3) thing they wanted to happen has happened (but it was not as expected/imagined).

The thought that arise when we are disappointed are “If I don’t have that, I will not be happy. I will not be able to continue living. I will not be whole.”

People deal with disappointment in different ways. Some people feel immediate anger or rage when they are disappointed. Some feel sorrow, self-blame, or low self-worth. Some detached themselves from disappointment. Which one is you??

When people are angry, they feel anxious, their body releases adrenaline or cortisol, that made want to fight or flee. They may break things or act impulsively.

When they are sad, they may withdraw into a shell, helpless, hopeless and loss motivation. If we are not careful, this can turns into depression.

The third option is detachment. What is detachment? Detachment is not being numb or un-emotional. Detachment is non-attachment. Detachment is an act of stepping back from the problem and stopping any action trying to fix or solve problem. It is common when we encounter problem, we want to make fix the problem or to make things better. Unfortunately, some problems can’t be fixed.

To practice detachment, we must observe our mind. Write down our current feeling or thoughts. Learn that life is full of change and uncertainty will help us realize that we cannot control everything. Redirect our focus to the joy that we have in present moment. The blessings that we have right now.

Detachment does not mean that we don’t care about life or a certain person. Detachment is know that everything in our life is impermanence. We learn to appreciate things/person as they are. What will you gain from detachment? We learn that expectation no longer rule your life or your emotion. We learn to let go. We learn that it is okay not to have “a certain something or someone.

“We learn to see the truth and we learn to grow as a person. Our heart expands and we gain freedom. We learn compassion. Turn your disappointment into opportunities.

If you are disappointed with your job, start making inventories of your skills and your strength; Create new job goal, find a new job, or start your own business.

If you are disappointed with your relationship, look within and find your value. Accept that sometimes it is not always personal. Think of this disappointment as growing pains. Stop beating yourself up and stop clinging. Without pain, there can’t be no growth.

Ask yourself: What do I really want in life? What is really important for me? We will have positive and negative emotions throughout our life. Knowing that emotion is part of life will get us unstuck and move forward to other experiences in life. Remember, giving up our attachment does not mean we are giving up on life.

With detachment, you will have peace and freedom, knowing that All is Well despite and in spite of everything that comes our way. We learn not to let external factors or situations affect us.

Have a blessed Sunday.

“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.”― Alexander Pope